One year ago today

A year ago today, I was terrified.
And frustrated.
And shocked.
And did I mention, terrified??

One year ago today, I found out I was pregnant. With you.

If I had known then, what I know now, my reaction would have been different. Nervous still, perhaps, but much more excited as I waited in anticipation of starring into your big, blue eyes.
Now, one year later, you are four months old.

You are still pretty small, weighing 12lb 4 oz (10%) and measuring 24.75 in (50%). You still fit into 3 month clothes and are still wearing a size 1 diaper. Some of your clothes are starting to look short or fit snug. Proof that though I refuse to admit it, you are growing.

You spend your days hanging around, flirting with me and your sister. You have the sweetest disposition I could have ever asked for. You never cease to melt my heart with your cockeyed grins and your pleasant coos. And those cheeks of yours attract my kisses like a magnet to a refrigerator.

These days you put everything into your mouth! In fact, if I didn't know better, I'd say we are in the early phases of teething. Some days those gums sure look white, though nothing is popping through yet. I guess time will tell.

We were told we could start you on rice cereal. So we did. And you were not quite sure what to think.

But, eventually, you figured out the concept of a spoon, and ended up eating a whole bowl! Afterwards, Ryleigh and I had fun singing the "He's a happy booooyyy!" song....over and over, while you squealed in delight.

A year ago, I could not have imagined what my life would look like with you in it. Now, I cannot fathom a day without you in it. Your smile lights up our home and provides the joy that gets me through days of difficult transition. I love you more than I could have understood a year ago. Happy four months, Wesley Haas. And thank you, Lord, for blessing me with a gift I didn't think I could handle.

Love, Mama