Growing

Wesley is definitely growing. He seemed so little at first and did not seem to fill out the way other babies did, so I was wondering when he would ever start to grow!

It seemed like within a week, whoa, he was bigger! He has started showing progress on his developmental milestones as well.

Pushing himself up while on his tummy...

Reaching out for objects and focusing on things...

Holding his head upright for longer amounts of time...

Focusing on people and interacting by smiling and cooing...

Stretching out his naps and feedings...even in his "big boy" bed in his room...

He really is the sweetest little guy ever. His digestive system seems much better, so that has to help make him feel better and be all-around happier. He is a great nurser, and though I imagine he is just going to be a spitter forever, he is not puking or projectile spitting anymore (knock on wood). He burps more now, rather than immediately spitting, which means we are getting more successful at getting out the air bubbles and not the milk! He is getting a little bit chunkier and has the cutest little double-chin ever. Those rolls make me smile so much, because I know he is getting what he needs from me and is finally putting on some weight. Way to go, Wesley!

I must admit, the fact that he is interacting with us much more now certainly helps. Last night he was UP, wide awake for about an hour and a half after his feeding. But, when he is sitting there smiling and "talking" to me, how can I be upset? It is too stinkin' cute! The other night while I was fixing dinner, Jesse was sitting with him, and Wesley was just talking his head off! Jesse and I were both laughing so hard, because though Wesley occasionally coos, he previously had not held conversation!!! HA! It was as if at the end of the day, he was griping at Daddy, telling him all about his day...probably something along the lines of, "I'm soo happy to see you! You have no idea what it is like all day with these silly girls!" Jesse was eating it up. Even now, Wesley smiles and talks more to him than he does to me. It's the man bonding. Super cute.

This week also marked a definitive proof of growth. I started packing up the newborn clothes and pulled out the three month clothes. Yes, most of them are still pretty big on him, but the newborns were getting too small. I also bought my first pack of size 1 diapers for our little man.

Time is flying by! He will be two months old tomorrow. Where did it go?

We have two-month appointment (complete with immunizations- yikes!) next week. I'll be interested to see his weight gain ~ I think he is doing great! Growing like a little weed. A cute little weed.

Shaped by tragedy

Often we think of defining moments in our life as the happiest of times. Graduating high school, starting college, getting married, starting a new job, buying your first home, having a baby. And truthfully, they are defining moments.

They define us in a timeline kind of way: when something big happened in life, I felt like X.

They certainly can go on to help shape us into the people we become, but they don't have to.

Starting college puts you in a place where you meet new people, experience life in a new way, and hopefully find out something new about yourself. But the EVENT of starting college does not shape you in and of itself.

Getting married opens you up to another human being in a way that no other relationship can, and it will take a lifetime journey to learn and grow and have the marriage relationship shape the person you become. But the EVENT of the marriage or wedding will not shape you.

Having a baby essentially holds up a mirror for you, seeing the best and worst parts of yourself through the eyes of your child. Guaranteed, the process of becoming a parent will shape you. But the EVENT of giving birth will not make you a different person.

This week brought a lot of thoughts about true life-changing EVENTS. A single thing that happened that instantaneously changed you. Or me, to be more specific.

Wednesday was the 10-year anniversary of the Aggie Bonfire Collapse. I was only a Junior in high school when it happened, and do not remember much about it, if I'm being honest. And to be even more honest, even while I was a student at A&M, I did not think too much about the absence of it. Yes, it was a sad and tragic event in the lives of thousands. But it did not impact me. I was not here. I did not have heart-strings to the campus. I did not know anyone affected. It was not a life-changing event for me. But this week, as the campus and community remembered the event on its 10th anniversary, it struck a new cord. I have ready several people's thoughts and stories about that horrible day. I have watched the remembrance videos on uTube. I have driven by the memorial. And I have cried all the way. Wow. It was a huge life-changing event. In a matter of moments, a core tradition was shaken and lost. People- kids, really, were killed. Family and friends, students and faculty, friend and foe (yes, I'm referring to t.u. here) were all united. By a horrific event.

Kind of like the Columbine shooting, or 9/11. One of those "changed in an instant" moments, that ultimately defined people's lives.

I had another defining moment for me this week, and it hit a little closer to home. We received an email at work informing us that one of our co-workers had been killed in a car accident. She had worked for our company for over 10 years. She was in the military reserves, serving twice in Iraq. And THIS is how she died. A couple blocks from home in her car.

The Chronicle reported that she had been in an argument with her husband and left to cool down. I do not know what is true, and frankly, the only ones who do know are she and her husband. All I know is that she was going too fast, hit a light pole and a brick wall and died on the scene.

Life, changed in an instant.

People, life is too short. It is much more fragile than we realize. I for one am sad that it often takes an event of tragedy to remind us of that. That more often than not, we are truly shaped by tragic events, rather than happy ones. Events that remind us to cherish life~ the ups and the downs. Drive a little slower. Kiss a little longer. Hug a lot more often.

I have been shaped this week. By the stories and heartaches of others through the Aggie Bonfire and by the loss of my own co-worker.

What about you? Do you have any life-changing events? Moments where you will always remember where you were, what you were doing when you heard, or something that rocked you to your core?

The "firsts" never end

I have been talking about doing it for months and months...and yesterday, I got brave and dared to take Ryleigh to get her first hair cut.

Jesse did not want me to get it cut at all, but it was really stringy at the ends. I promised him I would only get them to trim it and make sure it was even. I left Wesley with him, and then Ryleigh and I ventured out to a local haircut shop.

I was nervous about whether or not she would sit still, but sure enough, she did great! She climbed up on the booster and was excited to wear her "super cape." We had to remind her to look straight in the mirror a couple of times, but all in all, she really did well sitting still and letting the hairdresser cut her hair.



Truthfully, you cannot even tell that her hair has been cut- that is how little she took off. I considered asking her to trim more, but then let it go. It was even. The dead ends were off. And Jesse would be happy.

After paying ($11 for 5 minutes of time and barely a trim? UGH) and getting Ryleigh a dum dum sucker, we loaded up and ran a few more errands together, including picking up dinner at Chilis for the boys back home. All in all, it was a fun night.

On a side note, do you remember when Wesley was born and I said how I felt like Ryleigh grew overnight? Well, on a day-to-day basis, I see her in our home, next to him, learning new things, and seeming to get bigger and older every day. However, outside of our home, when I see her relationally to the rest of the world, I am reminded that she IS still little. Seeing her sitting in that big chair with her "super cape" on, she looked so small to me! And though to me, two and half years seems like she has been with us forever and is so old, in reality, she is really still quite young. It made me realize that perhaps my expectations of her are often crazy unrealistic. I think I expect her to "get" things I say and respond in the way that a child should...a child who is probably closer to age five or six, not two and a half.

So, though Wesley is the baby of our family, Ryleigh is definitely still my baby. And I really enjoyed hanging out last night, just us girls, and loving on her for awhile all by herself.

A familiar scene

Over the weekend, we enjoyed good family time, without much (or anything, really) on the agenda. It had been a long week, and all we wanted to do was lay around and hang out.

Wesley decided he needed to catch up on his cuddle time with Mommy and Daddy, and was most content to let us hold him and "play" with him all weekend.

Daddy was happy to oblige....especially now that the play time includes smiles and coos.

And occasionally, an all out giggle, complete with dimples.

I couldn't grab my camera fast enough! My heart was bursting, just watching my boys. It is so fun watching my husband love on our babies.

It brought back a memory of a familiar scene from two years ago...

It is no surprise that Ryleigh is very much a Daddy's girl. They have had a special relationship from the start, and now that she is older, she cannot get enough of "my daddy" (as she says all day long).

Something tells me that Wesley will all-too-soon be a Daddy's boy as well.

I love it.

Cashier caught in the headlights

This morning, after dropping Ryleigh off at school, dropping letters at the post office, and filling up my car with gas, I realized that I needed to make a quick run into Walmart. It is easier shopping with just one of the kiddos at a time, and considering that Wesley was asleep in his car seat carrier, I figured it would be an uneventful trip.

Once inside, I headed straight for the baby department, ready to stock up on diapers, baby bubble bath, new pajamas for the kids, socks, etc. And right about the time we got back there, I saw a tiny little preemie outfit. It was so little! Now, Wesley is still wearing newborn clothes, but they are fitting a little snug. Growth is a very good thing, especially with his tummy troubles; however, it made my heart sink a little to realize how fast he is growing already.

And then I heard a little squeal from him, as if he could sense that I was thinking about him, and getting sentimental. I looked down at his precious little face. My heart swelled with emotion.

And it happened.

Yep, those of you nursing Moms out there know what I'm talking about. My milk letdown hard and heavy. And you know what else? I had been so rushed to get out the door and get Ryleigh to school on time that I forgot my nursing pads.

Suddenly, I had two very large headlights plastered across my chest. And my eyes probably were as big as saucers. I froze, like a deer in the headlights. How can I get out of this situation as quickly and painlessly as possible???

I was so grateful that the baby department was at the very back of the store, right next to customer service and the restrooms. I grabbed a new box of nursing pads and headed to the restrooms, crouching behind Wesley's car seat as I pushed the shopping basket.

Would you believe that the restroom was closed for cleaning? Seriously. I hid in the back of the baby section for awhile, waiting for the "cleaning" to be complete. Never happened. And Wesley was starting to get agitated. I knew I was going to have to face the music and get out of the store. So, I took a deep breath, and crouching all the way, headed towards the front of the store to checkout.

Once I got to the checkouts, I scanned anxiously looking for an older woman to check me out...I figured if she saw, at least she would understand and be sympathetic. Luckily, I found a nice looking older woman, and though she was currently checking out someone else, I decided to wait patiently in line.

Wouldn't you know that the only male checker in the store was two aisles over, and literally walked over to me, letting me know he was available to check me out. And then trying to be helpful, he grabbed my shopping basket and led the way to his station. I wanted to die. My cover was blown! And my hiding shield was gone. I felt naked as a jaybird. I crossed my arms across my chest, never looked up to make eye contact, and I literally ran from the store to the safety of my car.

Utter embarrassment. I'll probably end up in one of those emails...you know the ones I'm referencing..."people you see at Walmart..." A picture of me; hair in wet pigtails, holey blue jeans, and my headlights beaming.

All because I dared to look at this sweet face.

Gosh my hormones are out of control.

And it's soooooo worth it.

HE is so worth it.

Nothing sweeter

Loony bin, here I come!

Wesley had a rough night last night, so Mommy had a rough time getting out of bed this morning. Ryleigh tried countless times to get me to "wakey wakey," without much success. After begging me to get her breakfast with only a grunt in return, she figured she should take the matter into her own hands.

Thus, left to her own devices, she whipped up a concoction of her own to snack on.
Complete with salt, pepper, oregano, bay leaves, and leftover orange juice from the day before. And oh yeah, a couple of Jersey's dog treats. YUM!

No, I don't think she actually ate anything, and I'm pretty sure Jersey stayed away, because she obviously did not come clean up (aka: lick) the floor. No harm done, right?

Welcome to Tuesday, Mom! It's gonna be a great day!

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

And yesterday's fun event? Mommy got to call poison control! Hooray!

After finding Ryleigh with some mysterious red stuff all over her face, I found the EMPTY bottle of Flintstone vitamins on her bed. Yep, she cleaned them out. Luckily, we were near the bottom of the bottle, with only 10-15 left, but still. I'm officially registered with poison control now.

Awesome Mommy.

Not only that, but when I did call panicking, and had to read information off the bottle, it turns out the vitamins were expired...in 2006!! BEFORE SHE WAS EVEN BORN. How in the world did I end up buying a bottle of vitamins (probably when she was 1 or so) that had expired a year before?!

Fortunately, the vitamins did not contain iron, which would then have required me to take her to the ER. And the fact that the vitamins were expired was a blessing, because then the minerals were not as potent as they should have been.

So, a little extra bright pee and lots of poo, but Ryleigh was fine.

Mommy needs a trip to the loony bin, but Ryleigh is just fine. :)

Trying to catch up

I have been trying to catch up for awhile now, and just can't seem to do it. I have added several new posts below, and though there is plenty more that has gone on, I may or may not get to all the posts I originally envisioned. I think I'd rather start writing in real-time now, than continue to attempt at the past. SO, without further adieu, the following posts have been added:

• A special visit
• Apples to...Oranges?
• Thankful
• Happy Halloween
• "One more cup please"

From here on out, I will be posting from the present. Hopefully I'll get back into the swing of it again. Thanks for your patience!

"One more cup please"

I am not a coffee person. I was never one who would go study at a coffee house or ask for coffee with dessert. Though I like the smell, I don't love the flavor. As a matter of fact, I can probably count on a few hands how many times I have been to Starbucks (maybe four hands...not that I know anyone with four hands...weird thoughts...sorry, I'm off topic...) Even then, I hardly think that a Java Chip Frappachino really counts as coffee. I can honestly say I have never purchased a hot cup of coffee. Ever.

But lately, Jesse and I have both been draggin' butt. Big time. Between Wesley staying up until 11 pm or so for his last feeding, waking up in the night for another feeding, and then Ryleigh waking up ready to go (and another feeding for Wesley) at 6 am....man, I'm pooped. Truthfully, I don't normally feel it once I get going in the morning, but lately I have not been able to get going!

Jesse mentioned that he drinks several cups of coffee every morning at work. I didn't even know he liked coffee! I asked him if he noticed a difference, and he said yes. So, while we were visiting my grandparents, I decided to try a cup when they were all drinking their coffee in the morning. Yes, I added milk and sugar, but I actually did like it, and noticed a difference in my sluggishness.

So this week, we made a purchase:
Jesse then went and bought coffee and creamer, and we came home excited to learn how to make coffee. (Haha, does that tell you how naive we are when it comes to coffee?!) As I made dinner, Jesse made a pot. It was horrible!

SIX. POTS. LATER, and after calling my sister-in-law, Jenn (the coffee queen), and looking up tips online, we were frustrated. The coffee was disgusting! We tried making it stronger, making weaker, following one person's tips, and following the instructions on the can. Nothing worked. It was gross.

The following day, I had to go grocery shopping. I decided to call my grandma and ask if it could be the coffee itself that was bad. She told me the kind that she made when I was there (Breakfast Blend) and gave me the measurements she used. So, while in the store, I compared the can of Breakfast Blend to the can we had used. Sure enough, Breakfast Blend is "mild" and the kind we bought was "medium-dark." Also, the creamer Jesse bought was a powder, not the cold creamers you get in the refrigerator section.

I bought a can of Breakfast Blend coffee and a cold Hazelnut creamer, just to try the flavor. When Jesse got home that night, he decided to try again, using the new products.

Success! And now we're hooked.

I have been drinking one cup every morning, and I actually can notice a difference in my ability to get up and get going. Considering I started back to work this week, I really needed the boost in the mornings. Not to mention, it is nice waking up to the smell of coffee ready and waiting for you. This could be my new habit.

In fact, I went to the store last night just to get some more creamer for this morning's pot. Wow, they have some good holiday flavors out!
This morning Jesse used the French Vanilla, and I of course went for the Peppermint Mocha. It was SO good, it could have been dessert. And to think that 2-weeks-ago, I thought coffee was gross and did not understand people's desire or indulgence in it. This morning's cup was so good, I actually did go back for a second cup.

:)

Happy Halloween!

Halloween 2009 had lots of festivities!

Trick-or-treating and a Halloween party at school for Ryleigh

The Halloween festival at Jesse's club

A Fall festival at FBC

Family and fun Halloween night

And of course, Trick-or-Treating

Don't forget the fun Halloween pajamas and kisses!

A fun time was had by all. And yes, we all slept good after the eventful holiday!

Thankful

I have always been lucky to have amazing grandparents. Grandparents who loved on us, taught us new things, supported us and my parents, and were just all around fun to be with. Some of my greatest memories include my grandparents, and I have always been so thankful for their presence in my life.

Now, I'm even more thankful for their presence in the lives of my own kids. It is so amazing to watch my Grandma take care of my babies, as if they were one of her own. Like my mom said, Grandma has the touch. The touch to calm, to soothe, to cuddle to sleep...it is perfect.

Ryleigh loves seeing "GG" and after we leave her house, always asks to go back. After this last trip to introduce Wesley to GG and Great Granddaddy, I imagine he will miss cuddling his booty next to GG on the couch while getting his back patted and soothed after a rough feeding time.

I'm so thankful to have loving and involved grandparents, and can not thank them enough for every way they touch my life.

Thank you for letting us come visit and for loving me and my babies so well! We love you more than words express.

Apples to...Oranges?

I have always heard that every pregnancy is different, as is every baby. But while I "knew" it in my head, I did not necessarily believe it would be true for me. Not only that, I was (am!) slightly frustrated that things were not more similar. I was counting on "knowing" what I was doing this time. But no, this time, there were different curve balls thrown. There were few similarities at all!

Planned pregnancy?

• Ryleigh- Yes! I got off birth control, carefully avoiding pregnancy for three months to make sure all the hormones were out of my body. I charted my ovulation all three months, and "tried" on the third month. Sure enough after waiting in anticipation of a missed period, I tested pregnant two days before my expected period, and we were both very excited to become parents.
• Wesley- Umm, kind of....? I had just gotten off my birth control, and no, we were not super careful. I definitely did not follow my ovulation or my cycles. I realized after being five days late that we were pregnant. We knew we wanted another baby, he just came a little earlier than anticipated. Our initial feelings were of shock, then nerves, and then of course, excitement.

Morning sickness?

• Ryleigh- I felt good for about a week. From then on, it was miserable. Morning sickness showed up fast and furious and lasted well into the second trimester. I lived off saltines and ginger ale (and TCBY yogurt) and any funky smells sent me running to the toilet. My best friend was Dramamine, which would knock me out for half the day, allowing my stomach to calm down. Don't get me wrong though; the sickness was not just in the morning. It was miserable all around.
• Wesley- I did get sick, but it did not start until later in the first trimester (around week 8 or 9) and was not near as severe. There were a couple rough days, but in general, once I got it out, I was fine for the rest of the day. There were a few isolated sick days during the second trimester, but nothing compared to my first pregnancy.

Worst puking moment?

• Ryleigh- Gosh, there were a lot of puking moments. Our entire vacation in Mexico, running to the bathroom at work and then curling up in a ball under my desk wishing to die, out in public places...often. I think the worst was one day after feeling incredibly nauseous and knowing I needed to eat something, I had gone through Chick-fil-A and got a chicken sandwich. While eating and driving down the highway, I started puking while driving, barely making it into a bag. Fun, fun.
• Wesley- The funny thing about my puking with Wesley, was actually Ryleigh! She was often around, and began imitating me, pretending to puke into her own little potty. Awkward! This was especially funny when I puked on the airplane on our way to Minnesota for the wedding-- me puking in the airplane bag, and Ryleigh imitating "Mommy sick." I think Jesse wanted to crawl under the seat.

Tired?

• Ryleigh- Not that I can remember. I know I slept a lot in the beginning, but it was more because of the Dramamine that knocked me out to stop the puking.
• Wesley- YES! I'm not sure if it was because of the pregnancy, chasing my active two-year-old, the move, or all of the above, but there were days I literally could not lift myself off the couch to get into bed at night. I could fall asleep anytime, anywhere.

Cravings?

• Ryleigh- TCBY yogurt; either a chocolate parfait with strawberries or a chocolate shiver with Reese's. And yes, they knew me at the drive-thru window. Anything chocolate and sweet was tasty during my pregnancy with her.
• Wesley- I don't think I had "cravings" per se, but when I wanted a snack, I tended to head more towards salty things, like chips and dip or peanuts. Don't get me wrong, I still had my share of sweets, this is me we are talking about, just not quite as often.

Belly pop?

• Ryleigh- I filled out throughout my entire belly and hip area, starting around 16-weeks.
• Wesley- Though I had started to get a little chubby, the belly officially POPPED, straight out, around 23-weeks.

Weight gain?

• Ryleigh- Lost a lot at the beginning, due to sickness. It all caught up to me in the third trimester though, and I gained 26-lbs, right on target!
• Wesley- Lost a little in the beginning, but not much. Gained a good amount in the beginning of the third trimester but it slowed down towards the end. Total weight gain was around 13-lbs. (I attribute the lack of weight gain on a crazy summer, including the move, as well as the added exercise benefit of chasing a toddler day in and day out.)

Maternity clothes?

• Ryleigh- Started wearing the "balloon" shirts around 16-weeks, shopped only at the maternity stores, and bought a lot of new pants, shirts, and skirts. I was working in the office more, but in general I liked buying the maternity clothes, because I wanted everyone to know I was pregnant. Looking back, they were completely unflattering, and often made me look huge! Not to mention they were just ugly in general.
• Wesley- I avoided as long as I could. I ended up buying a pair of jeans for every day wear and wore a lot of t-shirts. I did have to buy a few real maternity clothes for the wedding festivities, but other than that, I avoided at all costs. I even had a few regular pants and shorts that were not maternity, that if I pushed them low enough, I could wear throughout the entire pregnancy.

Heartburn/ Acid reflex?

• Ryleigh- YES. Tums sat by my bed every night and were used all the time.
• Wesley- YES. Tums sat by my bed every night and were used all the time. One of the few things that was the same. And if the old wives' tale is true, the indication of heart burn and reflex did in fact signal a lot of hair for both my babies. They both came out with a head full of hair.

Baby in the womb?

• Ryleigh- Active ALL. THE. TIME. Strong kicks. Often got the hiccups. That girl has been active from day one!
• Wesley- Definite patterns of actions. Strong kicks. Responded to music in the car and big sister's shrieks and laughter. Hiccups all the time! For the record, both of my babies still get the hiccups easily and often.

Baby preparation?

• Ryleigh- All I thought about the entire pregnancy was the baby. I read all the books. We registered for baby products and had several baby showers. We had more than enough "stuff" for her, and did not have to hardly buy anything ourselves. We talked about her all the time. The nursery, though it went through several changes, was still ready to go months before she arrived.
• Wesley- The pregnancy kind of took a back seat to the rest of life, including caring for Ryleigh, moving, working, and everything else! We did not need many of the big things we needed for Ryleigh (furniture, baby gear, car seats, etc), but needed all new clothes, decor, etc. Because of the move, we did not even start setting up the nursery or deciding what to do in there until a couple of months before he was due, and it was not finished until a few weeks before his birth.

Daddy's feelings and involvement?

• Ryleigh- Very excited right off the bat, though he had to find out the sex to "prepare himself, in case the baby was a girl." Sure enough, she was! I had still planned on going pretty neutral with everything, but oddly, he insisted some things go girly. Jesse loved sitting next to me on the couch at night and keeping his hand on my belly. He often asked about the baby and came with me to a lot of my doctor's visits, never missing an ultrasound. Nervous about the delivery and bringing her home, and super gentle handling her.
• Wesley- Shocked right off the bat, but much more open to the idea than I was at first. He was calm throughout the entire pregnancy and did not make as big a fuss about feeling movements. He was very excited about "getting a boy" and would often make comments about "the boy." Because of his early move, he did not get to go to many doctor's appointments, and actually had to miss one of the ultrasounds. During the actual labor and delivery, he was much more laid back, knowing what to expect, and has also not been so nervous handling Wesley.

Early signs of labor?

• Ryleigh- No cervical change until the 39-week. I had a few hours throughout the week of intense, non-stop cramping, but no contractions coming and going.
• Wesley- Pains very low in my pelvis, and already dilated and effaced at my 33-week appointment.

Due date?

• Ryleigh- My original due date was May 25. The doctor stripped my membranes two days before I was due, and Ryleigh arrived on May 24, 2007, one day before her due date.
• Wesley- My original due date was October 6. My body went into spontaneous labor and my water broke on its own, September 20, and Wesley arrived on September 21, 2009, sixteen days (about 2.5 weeks) before his due date.

Labor experience?

• Ryleigh-After the doctor stripped my membranes in the afternoon, I began to have contractions throughout the evening. The contractions continued to get stronger and closer together, and we finally went to the hospital in the middle of the night. I got sick during labor, received an epidural, the doctor had to break my water, and I only pushed about 15 minutes. There was a slight scare when her heartbeat dropped, and they realized the cord was stuck somewhere; though her right clavicle was broken during the delivery, everything else was smooth sailing. Total length of labor, from the time contractions started in the afternoon of the 23rd, to her birth on the morning of the 24th: about 16 hours. To read all the details, remember this post.
• Wesley- My water broke while sitting on the couch at home, though no contractions came during the entire trip to Houston and even after settling in at the hospital. Finally, pitocin was ordered and the contractions picked up. Two epidurals and a few hours later, after only pushing through a few contractions, Wesley made his grand debut. Total length of labor, from the time my water broke to his birth at 1:03am: a little over 7 hours (only 2 hours with contractions). To read all the details, see this post.

Baby size?

• Ryleigh- 7 lb 4 oz, 20.25 in
• Wesley- 6 lb 9 oz, 19,5 in (at Wesley's 2-week check up, on his actual due date, he weighed exactly 7 lb...still smaller than Ryleigh was when she was born)

Length of hospital stay?

• Ryleigh- We checked in around 1:00 am the morning of Thursday, May 24th, and were released mid-morning on Saturday the 26th. (~56 hours total)
• Wesley- We checked in around 7:30 pm on Sunday, Sept 20, and were released at noon on Tuesday, the 22nd. (~36 hours total)

Mommy's recovery?

• Ryleigh- I was pretty sore for a couple days, walking very slowly and was all-around hesitant to do much of anything for awhile. I had an episiotomy, and was very nervous about doing anything that could hurt the site. I was very gentle with my body for quite awhile.
• Wesley- Some soreness, but not too bad. The worst pain came from sitting on our new kitchen chairs that aren't quite broken in yet- ha! This time I tore on my own, though it was a small tear. I was not as scared of hurting myself, and allowed myself to get back to normal activity much sooner.

First major meltdown?

• Ryleigh- Mom and Julie came over, Julie had a cute new outfit for Ryleigh, and while we were in her nursery changing her into the new outfit, I just lost it. I "didn't know what I was doing, was tired, etc." It was at that moment I realized it was okay to let other people help me. :) Right, Mom?
• Wesley- Mom had come to help from the beginning this time, and on our first real outing (lunch at Chick-fil-A), I suddenly got emotional and cried right there at the table. For some reason, his birth seemed somewhat anti-climatic, like no one cared (though I know they did), and I was very emotional about whether or not people cared about him as much as I did. For the record, hormones and lack of sleep do crazy things to the sanity of the mind.

Baby temperaments?

• Ryleigh- Agitated and irritable. Ryleigh needed more attention right from the start, and would often cry and cry for no reason. I turned into the human pacifier because often the only way I knew to get her to stop crying was to feed her. She was never one for cuddling, and to this day, the only time she stops long enough to sit still and cuddle is when she is sick. That girl is always on the move!
• Wesley- Laid back and quiet for the first few weeks. Seriously, we never heard a peep out of him; and even when we did, it was more of a grunt than a cry. He fooled us though, because a few weeks later, he found his lungs and let us know very quickly that his little tummy gave him grief, with both reflex and vomiting after feedings, and gas and constipation a few hours after feeding. He is still a cuddler though, curling up on my chest and tucking his head up under my chin. Hopefully once we get his tummy under control, he will be a laid back baby once again.

WHEW! Well there you have it. I don't know if all the differences are due to the opposite sex (girl verses boy), or whether personality plays such a big role, or pregnancies and babies really are so different. I guess if we ever decide to have a third one, he/she will provide more insight. For now, I'm just happy that both my babies are healthy, happy little ones. And though there are days when I wish I did know what to expect, I'm thankful for a little variety as well.

On a side note, I don't really want to compare these two forever or deal with sibling rivalry, but it is hard to not compare! It happens automatically, thinking about milestones and wondering how much #2 will be like #1. I just have to be careful when they get older to not voice those comparisons to them!! Ryleigh does not need any additional reason to feel competitive...!!

A special visit

The weekend after my birthday, my sisters, Susan and Sarah both flew in town to meet Wesley and have some family hang out time. Because we are all pretty spread out, there are not many times when we all get a chance to get together; normally, it corresponds with a big event (like Susan's wedding this summer). This was the first time in awhile we had a chance to all get together and just hang out, without any plans or agendas. And let me tell you, it was a sweet time. Whenever we get together, it is normally at my parent's house. This time, everyone came and stayed at my house! And though I did not get to play hostess like I normally would have, it was very special having the girls stay with me.


Right off the bat, the girls showered love and gifts on Miss Ryleigh. That girl is sure spoiled with amazing aunts! Then it was my turn. :) They surprised me with a super sentimental and thoughtful gift- the forever entwined ring from James Avery. Apparently, they all have it, and gave it to me to complete the circle. Now all of us are forever entwined. It really touched my heart.

The visit was full of chit chatting, catching up, loving on babies, and of course giggles. Julie was in school, but she joined us as she could, and we tried to meet up with her as often as she was able.
For those of you who do not have sisters- you really are missing out. I can't explain it. There is something, unspoken, that truly binds your hearts together. As we get older and our lives inevitably drift apart, it never ceases to amaze me that my love and appreciation for them as people grows. The old phrase, "distance makes the heart grow fonder," really is true! Not only do I miss them and the laughter they bring in my life, but also, when we do get together, our catch up time is sweeter and more meaningful.

Since having children, I have also seen a new dimension in my sisters: they are aunts! And boy howdy, do those girls love my babies well. It warms me to the very core to watch them interact with Ryleigh or snuggle with Wesley. I don't know if you can see Wesley's shirt...Aunt Julie gave it to him. It says, "My Aunt Rocks" with little guitars on it. Honestly, I couldn't have said it any better. Ryleigh and Wesley's aunts do rock!

I was sad to Susan and Sarah go, though I know they needed to get back home to their own families. Luckily, Julie is still close by, so we get to see her from time to time. These visits are definitely cherished in my heart and I always look to the future in anticipation of the next get-together.

I love you girls, and love the way you not only love me unconditionally, but also the way you shower love on my babies. Trust me, they feel your love, and love you right back! Lots of love going around...haha. Thank you so much for coming to visit.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

And a post on my "sisters" would not be complete without mentioning the other special visit from my honorary sister, "the older sister I never had,' my cousin Michelle. Michelle also made the trip down (in the rain!) to share my birthday with me. She also loves me unconditionally and is often the voice of reason I need to hear when I let my emotions get the best of me. I love Savannah (and soon-to-be, Austin) like my own, and I see her loving on Ryleigh and Wesley the same.

Thank you, Michelle, for coming to visit and share my birthday with me. I love you!

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Have I mentioned lately how blessed I am?

Thank you, Lord, for the blessing of the sisters in my life!

Ryleigh and Wesley

I cannot believe I have two kids. Plural. More than one. YIKES.

At first, Ryleigh was very leery of Wesley, and frankly, not too interested. She took a couple of peeks at the hospital, but not much more than that.


Once we got home, she slowly warmed up to him. And I mean slooowwwllyy. In small increments.

Checking him out, every now and then....

Stealing moments with him when she thought no one was watching...

Still slightly unsure who this new little guy was and why he was on her domain.

Her feelings of affection grew over the next few days and weeks, and Ryleigh began loving on Wesley. Kind of like a bull loves on a cowboy. Tackles, full force ahead!

I don't think I mentioned in my introduction post my feelings regarding Ryleigh during and after Wesley's birth. I missed her while she was away from us and was so sad that she was not there when he was born to be the first to hold him. I worried about her reaction to him. And when she did come to the hospital, I saw her with new eyes. She grew over-night. I'm not joking. I kept starring at her on Monday, wondering when she got so big and thinking for the first time ever that she looked chunky. Those of you who know my daughter know that she is NOT chunky. I think I finally saw her relationally, in the same equation as Wesley. He was tiny = She is big. And sure enough, she officially was no longer my baby, but instead, is the big sister.

We have seen a few moments of jealousy towards Wesley. Like the time I was scrolling through channels, and paused briefly (like 30 seconds) on TLC's A Baby Story. Ryleigh took one look at the screen, saw/heard a baby, and immediately started yelling, "No, baby budda! It's Ryleigh's turn!" I guess she thought that was his channel...?

We have also seen some tender moments. Like when Ryleigh wanted to share her bed with Wesley, and was so excited that he wanted to cuddle with her.

Or the time when I was cooking dinner, and looked in to see my two babies checking each other out on the couch.

Ryleigh is not quite Mommy's little helper-- she is independent, after all-- but occasionally, she wants to be right there and be a part of whatever we are doing. She likes pouring the water on his toes during bath time, and handing Mommy wipes when changing diapers. Once, I even caught her trying to give him one of her baby doll's bottles. Sweet girl.

I'm sure we still have plenty of transition time ahead of us, but so far, Ryleigh is handling most of it pretty well. We had a few rough spots when we would take her to Mother's Day Out-- suddenly, she did not want to go anymore and would cry. I wonder if she thought she was getting the boot? Or that she would miss out on something while she was away? Who knows. She is doing much better again, and seems excited to see Mommy AND Wesley when we pick her up in the afternoons.

I have no doubt that these two will be sweet siblings- who love to hug and kiss each other, and also rough house and tackle one another. Right now, Wesley seems to have a chill personality, though I'm sure if Ryleigh has her way, she will get him roused up as soon as he is old enough. In the mean time, I imagine she will entertain him, by running in circles around him.

I can't wait to watch their relationship grow over the next weeks, months, and years. I'm sure they will be the best of friends.

Everyone wants to meet Mr.Wesley!

Wesley had his share of visitors, though spread out across the course of the past month. We tried to capture them all in pictures, but missed some.

Gaga with Wesley, shortly after his birth.

Aunt Julie, shortly after birth

Big sister, Ryleigh, checking him out the next morning,

Monday 9/21

Aunt Jenn

Monday afternoon 9/21

Uncle Justin

Monday afternoon 9/21

Grandaddy

Monday afternoon 9/21

Papa

Monday evening 9/21

Stacey

Tuesday morning 9/22

Great Aunt Darenda

Saturday 9/26

Great Aunt Kathy

Saturday 9/26

Great Uncle Charlie

Saturday 9/26

RaRa, meeting Wesley for the first time

Saturday 9/26

Great Aunt Judy

Saturday 9/26

On Saturday, we somehow missed a picture of Great Uncle Rick and also our friends Hayden and Lauren, who stopped by on their way to a wedding in town. Sorry I did not get your pictures!

"Aunt" Michelle and Savannah

Friday 10/9

Aunt Sarah and Aunt Susan

Sunday 10/11

It has been a full month of visitors, and we are so thankful! We love showing off our beautiful son, and having all of you to help celebrate his arrival. Thank you all for coming to visit and meet Mr. Wesley!

Introducing: Wesley Haas

I'm sure most of you know by now that our sweet little man decided to make an early appearance. I apologize for the tardiness of my post, but life has been slightly full.

My little man has arrived! In a whirlwind of events and an unexpected time line, Wesley Haas entered our lives. Care for the story? I knew you would. :)

So, my last post was on Friday the 18th and I was telling him to "hurry up." Like a good son, apparently he listened!

We really had no big plans for the weekend. There was a home football game on Saturday night, and of course, Jesse wanted to go. However, we never received tickets for the game, and he was quite frustrated about the situation, so I settled in for a long night at home with a frustrated husband and restless two-year-old. About two hours before the game, Jesse decides that we should go to the game and just buy tickets on our own...and he wanted to take Ryleigh with us! I was not real excited, if I'm being honest, but we got ready, loaded up, and headed to the game. We never found anyone willing to sell tickets, so we went through the box office and paid full price for tickets- UGH. Ryleigh loved riding around on Daddy's shoulders and seeing all the people everywhere. She had a good time at the game and actually sat still a lot of time; a big accomplishment for her! The flyover was not too loud, so she enjoyed watching the "eh-panes" go right over our heads. Then she saw the horses from the cavalry, Reveille, and of course the band-- her favorite! She has not stopped talking about the band! It was a late night, but Ryleigh did great, the Aggies won, and Jesse got to go to the game, like he wanted.

Why am I telling you all this? Because I'm convinced it had a part in Wesley's arrival! Do you know how much WALKING we did? Walking around campus, walking up and down the stadium ramps, walking Ryleigh around when she needed a break from sitting, walking down the stairs to avoid the crowd after the game...it had to do something.

That night, I was exhausted. Absolutely winded. We were expecting our friend, Chris to come stay the night, but I simply could not wait up. I went to bed and Jesse stayed up and hung out with him.

Sunday morning, Ryleigh woke up early as usual, and asked to make blueberry muffins. I got to chat with Chris for a little bit before he had to get on the road and Jesse made it home from work just in time to tell him goodbye. We debated about going to church, but I was still exhausted and did not feel like trying to meet people or try out another church. So, we decided to be lazy. When Ryleigh went down her for her nap, so did Jesse and I, and we all slept for a LONG time. During my nap, I had more dreams. (Yes, I am a constant dreamer.) This time, my dreams were not about the baby or labor and delivery...they were about food. Specifically, a philly cheesesteak style sandwich. No joke. I woke up, and Jesse and Ryleigh were both still sleeping, so I slipped out of the house in sweats (I still had not showered) and went to the grocery store to get all the necessary ingredients to make my masterpiece. I came home and got to work. Sure enough, I managed to wake them both up, and everyone was hungry. We feasted on massive sandwiches and got incredibly full. Naturally, we headed back to the couches to put in a movie.

Within a few minutes of laying down on the couch (around 5:15 pm), I felt a gush of liquid I had never felt before, and literally jumped straight up and headed to the bathroom. I had heard of people losing their bladder control towards the end of pregnancy, but considering I did not feel like I needed to go to the bathroom, I was confused. I went to the bathroom and was still perplexed. When I stood up again, I noticed another gush. And another. And then it clicked.

Jesse had seen me jump off the couch and had followed me into the bathroom, wondering what was wrong. I told him I thought my water had broke!! He brought me my phone and I called the nurse on-call. We discussed my progress from the last appointment (2-cm dilated and 80% effaced) and she agreed that my water probably broke. She asked if I was having contractions, and I told her no. She told me to head to the hospital.

At this point, our life kind of looked like you imagine in the movies. Jesse literally started running around our house throwing things everywhere, trying to get all our stuff ready to head to Houston. Ryleigh was kind of packed, but not really. I was not packed. Jesse was not packed. None of us were dressed for the day. He took off to go get Ryleigh dressed and packed, and then moved on to pack his own stuff. Meanwhile, I was surprisingly calm. I took a shower and started packing my bag. Jesse came running back to finish packing his bag and realized we needed to take Jersey too, since we had no one in College Station to take care of her while we were gone. By the time I was ready to go, Jesse had:

• Gotten Ryleigh dressed, packed, and in her car seat.
• Packed himself and got dressed.
• Packed Jersey's food and got her in the car.
• Loaded the infant car seat in the car.
• And placed a towel on my seat for the drive to Houston. :)

I got in the car, calm as can be, and looked over, and the poor guy had sweat dripping off his face. Bless his heart.

Once we got on the road (around 5:45 pm), we both got on our phones. I called my mom and told her what was happening, so she could be ready to intercept Ryleigh when we got to the hospital. Jesse called his dad and filled him in, and then asked if we could drop Jersey at his house on our way...unless things started progressing quickly, in which case, he would just meet us at the hospital and take Jersey himself. The plan was in place and we were on our way. The drive was not the crazy, speeding drive that you see on the movies, though Jesse did drive slightly faster than normal. The whole time, he kept looking at me, asking if the contractions were picking up. There was not one single contraction the entire time. Honestly, I was starting to doubt myself, because I assumed that once your water breaks, your contractions set in pretty quick, and I did not have any! Since things were fine, we went ahead and dropped off Jersey and then headed on to the hospital, arriving around 7:30 pm. When I got out of the car, another massive gush encouraged me that I was not crazy- my water was definitely broke! Mom and Dad met us at the door, and took Ryleigh, while Jesse and I headed up to Labor and Delivery.

We got checked into the hospital and spent some time in triage, monitoring contractions, vitals, etc. Still- NO contractions. However, they did a test, and confirmed that my water had broke. Also, I had progressed again, and had dilated to 3-cm and was 100% effaced. So, we proceeded to get moved into our private labor and delivery room. I think by the time we got into the room it was close to 8:30 pm. Mom brought Ryleigh back to say goodnight, and then took her home to get her in bed for the evening. Ryleigh was in good spirits, though she thought Mommy had "boo-boos" due to all the arm bands they had on me. I let her know that they were my pretty bracelets, and she was fine after that. I got a big hug from her and she was off for the night.

By this point, I was kind of bored. Nothing was happening! Seriously, not a single contraction. Meanwhile, the nurse kept asking me if I wanted the epidural. I thought she was nuts, because, like I said, there was nothing happening in my book! I felt nothing. We learned that my doctor, the doctor that I had been driving back and forth to Houston for, because I wanted HER to deliver our baby, was not on-call that night. In fact, none of the female doctors from the practice were on-call. Yikes. And apparently, the male doctors prefer their patients to receive an enema prior to delivery. Lovely. Never done that before. Fun times. Anyway, so once that was taken care of (around 9:00 pm) we were just hanging out waiting for something to begin.

Pitocin was ordered and they started it around 9:30 pm. Again, the nurse asked me if I wanted the epidural. Since I was still not feeling any contractions, I just thought it would be silly to receive a pain blocker, when I felt no pain! So I refused. Julie arrived to the hospital and was hanging out with Jesse and I, still waiting for things to pick up. Still, nothing was happening. The nurse kept coming in to check on me and up the Pitocin. Mom made it back to the hospital and Dad stayed home with sleeping Ryleigh.

Finally, around 10:00 or 10:15, I started to feel contractions. And boy howdy, did I feel them. Once they started, they hurt. Badly. According to the monitor that shows the strength and length of contractions, there was literally nothing, then one or two that appeared about half-way on the chart, and the rest were off the chart. And they were quick too, with only about 2-minutes apart. So, I around 10:35 pm, I asked for the epidural.

I felt pretty silly, because before the contractions started, I had told the nurse what high pain tolerance I had...and yet, once the contractions started, I only lasted about 20 minutes. Impressive tolerance, huh? Pitocin is the devil. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

The anesthesiologist came in around 10:45 pm and sent Jesse out of the room. Last time, they let him stay-- he just had to be across the room where he couldn't see the needle. He went to go hang out with Mom and Julie in the waiting room. The contractions were pretty intense, and I did my best to sit still while he positioned the needle to my back. It hurt like the dickens. I don't remember it hurting that much last time, if I'm being honest, but who knows if I just blocked it out. The anesthesiologist hung out in the room with me for a bit afterwards, making sure the epidural was going to take effect. It took awhile, but finally I started to notice my right leg go numb. He left, and said he would check in later to make sure all was well.

Well, the nurse stayed with me, and realized that I was still grimacing in a lot of pain during the contractions. I told her that the left side hurt really bad, and it felt a lot more concentrated. She called the anesthesiologist back, who checked the pump, up'd the dosage, had me roll to my side (which we had already done, hoping that gravity would work its magic), and he checked the location of the needle to make sure it was correct. Nothing would remove the sharp pain from the left side of my abdomen. I thought I was just going to have to deal with it, but the nurse would not have it. She could tell how badly it hurt when the silent tears started falling and the grimace would not go away.

Around 11:30 pm, the anesthesiologist came back, removed epidural #1 and then administered epidural #2. Yes, you read correctly. Two epidurals-- fun stuff! I felt bad and could tell he was irritated, it was late at night after all, but I wasn't making it up! Sure enough, within a matter of minutes, the left side started to go numb. Ahh, sweet relief.

The nurse let Jesse back in the room and I think Mom and Julie came in for a few minutes once I was comfortable again. I chilled out for about an hour, and then around 12:30 am, the nurse came back to check my progress. I was complete and ready to push! She left to call the doctor (whom I have never met- errrr) and get the rest of the nursing staff ready. About 15 minutes later, everyone arrived, and put on their game faces.

I pushed through about 3 contractions (3 pushes per contraction) and our little man was born at 1:03 am, on Monday, September 21, 2009.

Nothing can compare to the feeling of your new baby placed on your chest. Nothing.


He cried right away and turned pink, healthy as can be. While I was getting fixed up, (luckily, there was only a small tear this time...apparently this doctor does not do episiotimies unless absolutely necessary) Daddy cut the umbilical cord and then followed with the camera as the nurses cleaned him up, weighed and measured him, and stamped his hand and foot prints. He weighed 6 pounds 9 ounces and was 19 and a half inches long. Perfect, if you ask me.


After the delivery, our son was wide awake, and I went ahead and began nursing. He took to it like a champ! Never an issue. I guess boys really do know their way around a boob from the get-go....!!

Mom and Julie were the only ones there, but they came in and met our new little addition, and took a picture of the three of us.

We hung out for a little while, but the nursing staff came to take the baby to the nursery for his bath and initial tests. Then it was time to move to my new room for the remainder of our hospital stay. By the time we got to the new room, settled in, and met the new nursing staff, it was 3:30 am. Jesse got comfortable on the couch bed, or at least as comfortable as he could, considering it was a couch bed, and I closed my eyes. About that time, they brought the baby back to me, and it was time to nurse again. And then the nurses came back to check my blood pressure....again. And again. Meanwhile, waiting for feeling to resume in my legs so I could attempt to go to the bathroom. Ha. Needless to say, I did not get much sleep the remainder of the night.

Monday morning, we anxiously waited for Mom to bring Ryleigh back to the hospital and meet her baby brother. I did not really have any kind of expectations, just curiosity as to how she would respond.

Anyway, when Ryleigh arrived, she had a balloon and a huge teddy bear for her baby brother. She walked into the room real slowly and hesitantly, and then came to see Mommy. After a few cuddles, she was ready to meet the baby. She went with Daddy to go look in the bassinet, still holding on pretty tightly to Jesse. She was not all that interested. After a few more minutes, she went to go look at him herself, peering through the plastic.

Finally, she was ready to hold him. At least for a few seconds...

We had more visitors throughout the day on Monday- my dad, Jesse's dad, and Justin & Jenn and the boys all came by to meet the baby. Mom brought Ryleigh in and out, as she tolerated it, and Julie came by once more before heading back to College Station.

Did you notice a key player who was not mentioned? Jesse's mom was out-of-town! Great timing for me to go into labor, right? Apparently she was out-of-town when Caleb was born too, who also made an early appearance. Perhaps out-of-town trips are not good the month before the baby is due...

Monday afternoon, after Ryleigh had gone home for her nap and came back feeling much better, she was able to participate in the sibling wall! All around the maternity ward of the hospital, there are colored hand prints with big brother and big sister names. The nurse said they are running out of room, but have one little corner left. Jesse took Ryleigh (and Mom took the camera so I wouldnt "miss" it), and she got her hands painted pink to put her prints on the wall. I think it is a super cute idea to get the siblings excited and participating in something fun of their own to celebrate, in their own way, the birth of a new brother or sister. Ryleigh loved it!

Have you noticed throughout this post that I have not used his name? Yeah, that is because we still did not have a name. We deliberated names the entire drive to Houston. We talked about them during labor. We discussed some after he was born. We spent all day on Monday talking about them, asking visitors their opinions. At one point, Jesse even used the dry erase marker to make a list of names on the window! Everyone thought we were joking about struggling to find a name. My sisters were convinced that we really had a name picked out and just did not want to tell anyone! Nope. We REALLY could not decide on a name.

During all the paperwork, he had no name. When they put Ryleigh's hands on the wall, it said "Ryleigh: Big sister of _____ 9/21/09." He was referred to as "Baby Boy Shulse" by everyone. We even tried out different names on him, and nothing quite fit.

Tuesday morning, I was released to go home, pending the baby's release. We were both released and ready to go by 10:00 am. Only one small problem. We needed a name on the birth certificate, so the staff could turn it in and get his social security number! No joke, deciding his name held us up at the hospital until lunch time.

Finally, after much deliberation, we tossed a coin.
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Just kidding! We did not toss a coin!! No, we finally realized that we both liked the name Wesley and though it did not seem to "fit," it probably was because we had been trying so many names and had not been calling him Wesley consistently. Surely, after a few days, it would roll off the tongue.

So, we finalized the paperwork and dressed Wesley in his Texas A&M onesie, just like we did with Ryleigh, and put him in the car seat to go home. Tiny little thing!

Wouldn't you know that when we got to the car, it was raining. I mean pouring. Do you know that when we left the hospital with Ryleigh it was also raining? Talk about stirring up a new Dad's nerves! It's scary driving your newborn for the first time, then you add the rain on top of that...anyway, you get the picture. Luckily, with Ryleigh, we only had to drive 10 minutes to get home. With Wesley, we had an hour and a half, on one lane roads! And yes, it rained the entire trip. But we made it.

Once we got home, Jesse and I started cleaning up. Remember the grand meal I had made of philly cheesesteak sandwichess shortly before plopping myself on the couch? Well, the evidence was still everywhere. I did the dishes while Jesse did a quick dust and sweep. Shortly afterwards, my mom arrived with her bags and Ryleigh in tow.

Ryleigh was more receptive to her "baby Wes-we" at home in her normal environment, and enjoyed holding him on the Boppy...at least for a few seconds. :)

All in all, the experience was a whirlwind. From the time my water broke to the time I delivered was a little over 7 hours, and when you consider that during that time we drove to Houston, dropped off Jersey, went through triage, changing rooms, starting pitocin, and two epidurals...it all happened quickly. AND if you consider the fact that my contractions did not start until 10:15 pm, I was only really in labor for 2 and a half hours, half of which was trying to figure out the epidural situation...that is REALLY fast. We were back home within 40 hours from the time my water initially broke.

It was an experience I could never forget.

And for the record, since I have mainly given out the facts of the delivery and steered from the feelings, let me tell you how I felt about my son. You know how I was worried about having feelings for him as strong as I felt when I had Ryleigh? I was gravely mistaken. When they laid Wesley on my chest and I looked into his squished, swollen face, my heart grew again. My eyes welled up and a lump rose in my throat. He was my son. He IS my son. And I could not get enough of him. He slept in my arms Monday night, because I could not get enough of his soft hair on my cheek. I kept starring at his little nose and pursed lips, wondering how I could love anything more. I'm completely smitten. The capacity of a heart is amazing. It continues to grow and love, even when you think you cannot love anything more. Trust me, you can.

I'm so thankful for a healthy pregnancy, uncomplicated labor and delivery, and a beautiful new addition to our family. Thank you all for your encouragement, excitement, and prayers. We are beyond blessed and excited to have Wesley Haas in our hearts and lives.

Do you know what my prayer calendar said on the day of his birth?

Remember that deliverance comes from the Lord, and it is an ongoing process. It is God who has "delivered us from so great a death, and does deliver us; in whome we trust that He will still deliver us" (2 Corinthians 1:10).

God delivered me from pregnancy. He has safely delivered my son from my womb to my arms. And though I know it will be an ongoing process, learning to parent him and train him in the way that he should go, I can only pray that one day the Lord will write His name on Wesley's heart and deliver him from the great death.

Thank you, Lord, for the amazing gift of Wesley Haas. I pray that you guide Jesse and I as we raise this little one to one day rise up and call you Lord. Please keep Ryleigh's heart open to change as we transition from a family of three to a family of four, and grant me the patience to handle the long days of raising two little ones. Give Jesse wisdom to lead our family and encouragement to show his son what a Godly man looks like. Thank you Lord for continuing to bless us, though we are not worthy. We love you and love these little lives you have entrusted to our care. All glory to you, forever. Amen.

37 weeks

I am 37 weeks along now, and time is crawling. The last month of pregnancy is the worst!! I'm very uncomfortable, and big, and just ready to meet our little guy! Okay, enough whining...at least for now.

We are in the final stages of waiting. Within 2-weeks, we will meet our newest addition, and we could not be more excited. Jesse is excited. Ryleigh is excited. And I'm super excited. Last night I had my first real baby dream about our boy. I dreamt about the labor and delivery (which did not look at all like my real-life birth plans) and saw his sweet little face. Again, it was clearly not a real scenario, because he was bald as can be in my dream, and we already know he will have a head full of hair. The final kicker was when he immediately starting cooing and "talking" after birth, saying "my daddy." Haha. I do not foresee that happening in the delivery room... Needless to say, I woke up this morning very excited to truly look into the face of my son. I cannot wait to nestle his little cheek against mine and stroke his back. I want to know if he will have the short/stout build of his mommy and daddy, or if he will be tall and skinny like his big sister. I know time will tell, but man, time is crawling.

A couple of my co-workers took me to lunch this week and gave me a mini-baby shower, with cute little blue clothes, bibs, washcloths, pacifiers, and $$ to "get whatever else I need." It was such a sweet gesture. and meant a lot to me. After many weeks of research, I used the money to order a navy Moby wrap.
I'm excited to try it out, as it primarily has great reviews. I'm sure it will take some practice learning how to wrap the thing correctly around me and feel safe with the baby, but I'm hopeful that once we both get comfortable with the logistics, we will love the freedom and flexibility it brings. I still have my Baby B'Jorn we used with Ryleigh, and I'm sure we will use it later, once he is bigger and has more head control.

This week brought with it another doctor visit. Things still look good, and it appears we are progressing! I am now up 12 pounds total, and the belly seems to have "dropped" even further in my pelvis. (I had kind of assumed that, since my weird pelvic pain has increased again.) When the doctor checked me, I was "almost" 2-cm dilated and 80% effaced. She was very pleased about that, saying we will have absolutely no problem inducing the last week of September...if I make it that far. She did not end up stripping my membranes, but we will try that at next week's appointment and see if it can bring on labor naturally.

Lastly, more pictures. I have been very frustrated lately, feeling big as a house. Every night I stand in front of the mirror and complain about my huge belly. The other night, we had some nice weather so I had taken Ryleigh for a walk. Jesse made a comment about how my "outfit" (tank top and shorts) did not make me look pregnant at all from the back. I have heard this from several people, but its hard to believe when I don't see the back...I only see the massive front! So, Jesse went and got my camera and had me pose for 3 views, so I could "see myself" from behind.

In case you ever wanted to check out my saggy butt... haha. But truly, you cant see the belly in this picture! Nice!
Oh yeah- there it is.

And you certainly can't miss it (or the "outie" belly button) from the front!

Oh well. I guess it could be worse. I was definitely wider with Ryleigh, so I shouldn't complain too much. I'm thankful to be healthy and prayerful for a healthy baby.

We're in the home stretch, and I'm excited and ready. Hurry up, baby boy! Your family is anxious to meet you!

A new family "must-have"

If you remember quite a few posts back, I mentioned that I have enjoyed cooking again and have been trying new recipes. At first, most of those recipes were dinner-oriented, though lately a lot of the new recipes I have tried have been more dessert-based...haha.

Anyway, so while living with my parents this summer before the move, my mom got me hooked on my Granddad's homemade BBQ sauce recipe. It is the perfect blend of spicy and sweet, and it really goes well with anything! I have made it twice since we have moved in and Jesse quickly became obsessed. Literally. I would find him in the kitchen with a spoon, just eating the sauce. Weird, I know.

I have not cooked as much these past few weeks, just being busy with work and traveling back and forth to Houston a lot, and Jesse has been asking about the BBQ sauce, pretty much every other day. No matter what I have made for dinner, he says, "no BBQ sauce to go with it?"

So today I made a double-batch. We had BBQ pork chops and baked potatoes for dinner, and then I "bottled" the rest of the sauce to keep on hand.

Something tells me that once the baby arrives and Jesse is responsible for making more dinners, we will be eating a lot of BBQ....

As long as it is with my Granddad's sauce though, I don't think either of us will mind one bit!

Our new kitchen table!

We got our new kitchen table!

It came at a price...mainly, my pride, but it sure looks pretty, and is worth more than the pride I lost to get it. "Pride?" you ask? Um, yeah.

You see, we had been negotiating the price of this table and chairs with Ashley Furniture for over a month. They were having a so-called 'promotion,' and I just thought it was not much of a promotion. I went back into the store at least three separate times, talking to different people, trying to get someone to work a deal with me. It literally came down to a $100 difference in what I was willing to pay and what they would accept. I had the cash in hand, ready to hand over, and no one would take it. They would not "throw in a chair" or "offer free delivery..." nothing. Basically, they were uncompromising, and I got so angry the last time, I mouthed off to the salesman and swore I would never go back.

(I'm not a crazy woman, I promise. But I do live on a budget. And, I'm potentially a great customer for a salesman, because I have a half-empty house I want to furnish! All I wanted was someone who was willing to work with me and be willing to compromise somewhere in the deal. Know what I mean?)

Anyway, so I swore I would never go back. And so Jesse and I were again at ground zero, starting our search again. We even went to Houston, looking for anything we could find. Nada. Needless to say, I was incredibly frustrated.

SO. Back to me having to swallow my pride. You see, Jesse had planned on doing the Labor Day triathlon for many months. He and several of his friends all signed up together, ready to go kick some major booty together! But then, he got a new job, and we moved, and his training went out the window. He debated about going at all and kept saying that he just wasn't there "mentally." Well, I called his bluff. I told him that I thought he was being prideful, because I knew he was worried about getting his butt kicked by his friends! HA! Guys are so competitive. He admitted it would be hard on his pride, and I told him to get over it, go, and have fun with his friends!!

When he got home from the triathlon on Labor Day, he slyly asked me if I was going to take advantage of the Labor Day furniture sales. I kind of looked at him like he was crazy and reminded him that we had no options. He suggested I go back to Ashley and try one more time. I argued with him for a few minutes, saying that I would never go back there, and he asked me if it was because I was too prideful. Umm, YEAH. I made a fool of myself the last time I was in there! He told me he would love that table and chairs we picked out, and really, I should try one more time. I asked him to go with me, and he laughed and said "no way! You got yourself into this prideful mess, I'm not going to get you out!"

So, I went, by myself, with cash in hand. I walked straight in to the table and chair set we liked and sat down. Sure enough, a salesman came over. I had noticed several of them standing together, a couple of which I recognized from my previous visits, and the one I had mouthed-off to was right in the middle. Yikes. I was thankful when he did not approach me!

I spoke with the salesman, very directly, about what my expectations were. I told him what I wanted. I pulled out the cash I had available. I explained that I just wanted someone who was willing to work with me, and assured him I would be a returning customer if I could find the right person to work with. He noticed my belly and asked me when I was due. We crunched some numbers, and sure enough, he could not lower the price anymore than the original amount ($100 over what I suggested). BUT, he did offer to throw in free delivery (~$80) so that I would not have to move the furniture "in my current condition."

I took the compromise.

(On a side note, the salesman told me afterwards that I was recognized the second I walked in the door, and that the other guys did not jump at the chance to come help me. Aww. It kind of made me feel bad and I almost went over to apologize for my previous behavior...but, I was still too prideful for that.)

Lo and behold, we finally bought a table and chairs, and it was delivered and setup for us this week! It is a very solid piece of furniture, with black and brown tones, upholstered/padded chairs, and an interesting pattern on the table. We went ahead and ordered six chairs, though we will probably only keep four around the table normally.

What do you think?

I repainted our bar stools to a black/brown to make them match better...
If you notice, there are several wood tones in the 'brown' wood. We really liked this, so we don't have to be too matchy matchy with all the other furniture in the house. Because the floor plan is so open, we didn't want to be tied into one color of wood. And this way, it really goes well with our kitchen cabinets as well.

Check out the solid base! I have always been a little leery of round tables, worried they would feel unstable, but this table does not move.

Haha, you can also see Ryleigh's chair in the background...complete with a plastic cover and booster seat. Though the upholstery is supposed to be very clean-friendly, I'm not taking any chances in the chair of a two-year-old!

There ya have it. The long story and the pretty pictures. I for one, am just thankful that we no longer are eating on TV trays and folding chairs. :)

Slowly, but surely...

We ARE going to find our place here in College Station...and so far, my neighbor has greatly helped us get started! Ryleigh had her first day of Mother's Day Out on Friday, and can I just say, wow- she was excited.


She would ask me repeatedly about "going to sku," and kept reminding me that it was only a "cup-a days" until she could go. The program here is a little different, with shorter, more organized days. I'm sure she would have had more of a schedule to follow anyway, getting older and all, but regardless, we were excited about the routine. We signed her up for two days a week.


Ryleigh jabbered non-stop all morning, getting her ready. She put on her new Elmo backpack first thing when she woke up and wanted to help me fix her lunch. She asked specifically for "baids" in her hair, and giggled about her new friends the entire time I was braiding.

She went straight into her classroom, running to new friends and picking up toys to play with. I asked her for a hug and kiss, and she grinned and told me no. She truly cared less when I left; which should have made me sad, but truthfully, I was just so excited that she was excited, I did not care.


When I picked her up, her teachers said she did great! (I always wonder how much they filter info...) They told me she stayed dry all morning and told them when she needed to go potty, she was sweet to the other kids, and she LOVED painting her picture. Ryleigh jabbered excitedly the entire way home, and even sang my "get to go to school" song that I made up last year when I was trying to get her excited about school. We hung her painted picture on the refrigerator, and she kept taking it off to show Jesse and I. She keeps asking when she can go back, and I'm happy to tell her, "in only a couple of days."


Super Hooray for my neighbor helping us get plugged in!


On top of that, the same neighbor invited Ryleigh to her daughter's 3rd birthday party at The Bounce on Saturday. It was right during Ryleigh's nap time, so I was worried about how she would behave. When we first got there, she did great, running and playing, bouncing on everything. During the birthday party, she did not want to sit still, and I kept chasing her around. At one point she fell off the table, and from then on, every time any little thing happened, she would cry. And cry. And cry. Finally, I just took her home. So, she did not really meet many new friends or interact with people the way I had hoped...


However, I met some wonderful ladies and thoroughly enjoyed visiting and getting to know them. Honestly, I wish I could have gone to the birthday party by myself!! Sad, I know. Anyway, so several really nice people, including a few more neighbors. I cannot wait until it cools off and we can start hanging out outside again- I think we are surrounded with some great people, and I look forward to getting to know them better. I also got hooked up with several ladies in a local Mom's club, and they helped me get information about plugging in there. I guess they have get-together opportunities several times a week, and you just come and go as you can. I'm definitely going to try to get plugged in there!


SO, we are slowly but surely building a new life here. I know it will take awhile to feel apart of it all, but I'm so thankful for the kind women who have reached out to me so far. I look forward to repaying the favor and getting to know and love on these women who have taken time to do so much for me. Yay for friends!

Joining a new club

Brent and Susan are pregnant!

She said from the get-go that they wanted a honeymoon baby, and sure enough, Baby Burns is on its way, due mid-April 2010. Hooray!

It will be so fun to watch one of my sisters become a Mom, and start getting some Holder-family cousins for Miss Ryleigh and baby boy. Though I have a niece and several nephews on the Shulse-family side, I'm sure it will be different when the babies come from my own sisters. I'm very excited to join this new club, and look forward to meeting Baby Burns next Spring.

In the meantime, please be praying for Susan. Unfortunately, she has been very ill these past few weeks and really struggling. We are thankful that she got some medication from her doctor that seems to be helping. I'm hopeful that once her body adjusts to this new little addition and she gets through the first trimester, perhaps she will begin to feel better.

Congrats to Brent and Susan! We are so excited for you!

Date night

Last Sunday night, while Jesse was in Austin for his triathlon, Ryleigh and I had our date night. Aunt Julie even came along to join in the fun and greasy pizza!

Yes, we went to Chuck-E-Cheese. And if you notice in all of the pictures, Ryleigh is a little fuzzy...that is because she did not stop moving the entire time we were there.

When we got our food, she maybe ate two bites, which is strange considering she LOVES pizza. Too much excitement, I guess. She could not sit still long enough to eat! That's alright though, because Julie and I thoroughly enjoyed the greasy pizza. :)

And, it wouldn't be a girl's date night without a pedicure. Ryleigh picked out her color (and mine), and we had fun "penting" our toes. She still shows me her "pretty toes" every day, despite the fact the paint is already chipping. Anything looks better with a little nail polish. :)

We also made cookie dough, and I introduced Ryleigh to the concept of eating the dough off a spoon, rather than actually making cookies. At first, she was a little leery...but once she tasted it, oh man, I had to hide the dough! Seriously, I put it on the top shelf of the refrigerator. That girl loves her some cookie dough!!

If date nights are always this fun, we're going to be sending Daddy out of town more often!

(Not really...)

September 6

Today is September 6. Which means, for those of you not counting down days, that our little man is due in exactly one month...while realistically, he will come before then (because my doctor wants to induce the week before).

Hmmm....YIKES.


I am ready to meet the little guy and Jesse and I are both getting more and more excited. My belly moves most erratically these days, and still pretty constantly. Jesse can be sitting completely across the room and notice the entire contortion of the belly change and he'll say, "holy cow- that kid is strong!"

I did finally kick into "nesting"mode, when I panicked and realized I was completely NOT ready, should he decide to make an extra early appearance. I have since remedied that (for the most part), getting as much ready as I can. The nursery is functional, all clothing is washed/folded/hung, and the dresser is complete with newborn diapers and wipes. I washed the car seat insert, as well as the swing and bouncer cloths, and then took the Lysol to everything else. The bedding is all washed and in place, for the crib and cradle, and we now have a new sponge bath, blue wash cloths, and extra small hoodie towels. We're ready.

Yes, there are still some things on the wish list and a few things that should be done before he arrives, BUT, should he make a surprise entrance, we will not be in panic mode.

I think it is so strange that when you are pregnant the first time, the little one growing inside consumes your every thought. You count every day that you are pregnant, waiting in absolute mystery and enchantment for the baby to arrive. This time around, though I do think about the baby and I countdown to meet him (and no longer be pregnant!), it is not the same. The ironic part? I still think about Ryleigh. I worry about how the baby's arrival will affect her. I wonder about her response to him being in our home. I am nervous about learning how to properly divide the attention, so she does not resent him for taking away her Mama. I realize that people have multiple babies all the time, and these things more-or-less work themselves out. I also truly think she is excited and as much as she can understand what is happening, she does. I know she will be Mommy's little helper and be a sweet big sister...at least most of the time. I guess this time, she is again the "unknown." This time, we have a much better idea of what to expect from a newborn, but no idea what to expect from a 2-year-old adjusting to a newborn. Once again, we'll try to take it all in stride and learn right along with her. It's just interesting to me how perspective changes.

So, there ya have it. We are in the final countdown, and I'm ready to meet my little man. We're still trying to come up with a name, and something tells me we will not have a clue until he arrives. I guess I'm okay with that. Maybe we will look into his face and just know.

Oh yeah- want to see a picture of the massive belly? I know you do. No comments please, I already know it is huge.
My prayer requests for these last few weeks include:

• Jesse having the time, energy, and effort to really focus on the golf course right now. I want him to be in a good peace of mind when the baby arrives, so he can at least allow himself a couple days away, while we're in Houston, to just focus on our new family. Hopefully, getting things in a place where he feels comfortable will enable him to do that.
• Ryleigh getting lots of lovin' and special attention these last few weeks. I don't intend to stop the attention once the baby arrives, but right now, during our last month as a family of three, I want to make it special and really remember this time together.
• Hopefully get the house in working order. This especially includes finding, ordering, and receiving a kitchen table. Yes, you read correctly. We have no table. Currently, we eat off two tv trays and some folding chairs. We need a table. Please pray we get this situation remedied ASAP, so we don't have to worry about it once the baby arrives.
• I would like to get my work load in a place that it is manageable for my replacement. I'm going to be in major crunch mode this week and next wrapping up a big project, and from then on, I will just be trying to get everything in order.
• My uncomfortableness is not fun. The heartburn and acid reflux are killing me, as well as all the other weird uncomfortableness that comes from the last month. Pray for patience as my body finishes up this stage of the process.

Well, there you have it. We're close, but not there yet. We're ready, but still nervous about what to expect with two. We're busy trying to prepare, though knowing you can never fully prepare. All is well, and we are so thankful for all the kindness, encouragement, and support everyone has provided throughout this pregnancy. Thank you all!

Some pictures of our new home...a work in progress...

I guess you all have been patient with me long enough. Please keep in mind that nothing is "done," and you will notice that I'm only showing the bedrooms because the living area is still empty with no furniture, no rugs, no decor, no window treatments....nothing. I can tell this is going to be a work in progress for a few months, doing a little at a time, as we have time and money to do what we want.

In the meantime, here is a sneak peak at the bedrooms.

The nursery

A close-up of the bedding. We ended up going with the Kasey series from Pottery Barn Kids. You know me, I'm not one for themes, so this provided colors and patterns we liked, without theme.

My new rocking chair, glider, and recliner! I'm so excited about my new chair, I can hardly stand it. With Ryleigh, we had a rocking chair, and it was good for rocking her to sleep and calming her down, but not the most comfortable chair ever, and definitely not conducive to nursing. This chair will be moved into our room when he is born and staying in our room (for those late night feedings,) but will eventually go back into his nursery once we officially move him in there. I like it though because I think the chair looks versatile enough, we can use it later, after kids, anywhere we want, and not look like we are using a "nursery chair" in our home.

The changing table, complete with a new contour pad and cover, wipes, baby lotion, the works. And yes, the drawers are full of clean baby clothes, socks, and pajamas, and the itsy bitsy newborn diapers. Can I just tell you how much those took me back? Babies grow so fast!

Julie's hand-stenciled wall art! I had bought some plain canvases, not having a clue what to do with them. My sister is very creative and quite artistic, so I made them her project instead of mine. I think they turned out super cute. Thanks, Juls!

On to Miss Ryleigh's room. I'm sure it looks familiar, since we used the same stuff from her old room, but thought I'd show it off again (and its new configuration).

I don't know if you can tell, but both of the kid's rooms have raised ceilings. I really like them and think it adds a touch of flair to the room. This house also has carpet in the bedrooms, which we did not have in our previous house, and I am enjoying being able to play on the floor with Ryleigh in her room, without my knees hurting!

We do have a twin-size bed that we will eventually move in here. Obviously, the toddler bed will not last forever. But, in the meantime, she really likes her "big girl bed," so why mess with it?

The office/guest room. Yeah, this room is currently a "use what we have...for now" room. We plan to buy a new bed frame or headboard, new bedding, a bedside table, new desk/hutch, etc. The room will probably receive a total overhaul. But, until we can furnish the living areas of the house to my standard, I refuse to spend money on this room. So, in the meantime, we are using what we have to make it functional, though not necessarily pretty.

The master bedroom. Would you believe when we moved into our last house, the master bedroom was painted baby blue. During our painting party, before we ever moved in, we painted that room to get rid of the blue. When we bought this house and the master was again baby blue, we kind of shrugged our shoulders and said, maybe we are destined to have baby blue?! So, for now, we're going with it. Against our dark furniture and white bedding, it does not look horrible. Just blue. :)

The entrance to the master bath is on my side of bed this time! Yay! I have been so thankful, especially with the late night trips due to pregnancy bladder. Oh, and another cool thing is that there is a pocket door to the bathroom, so we don't have to lose space to a regular door swinging into the bedroom or bathroom. We really like the feature so far.

The master bath vanities. I like the fact that Jesse has his side, and I have mine. The granite counter tops are nice, and the light fixtures are pretty. There is also a ton of storage space under the cabinets and lots of drawer space, which I love. The jacuzzi tub and large shower are also nice. All in all, we are very happy with our master bedroom and bath.

Well, there you have the bedroom tour. Hopefully, we will be back shortly with more pictures of the living area, once we finally decide on furniture, get it ordered, get some decorations in place, and make our home look like a home instead of an empty college apartment. :) All in good time. Patience is a virtue, right?

My birthday came early this year

Saturday morning, I went and bought myself my birthday present. Jesse was hoping to be able to go with me, but naturally, work ran late and I was on my own. (I think he thought I would wait until 'another day' but we are running out of 'other days,' so I went on my own!)

I had been doing some research, trying to find what I wanted with the budget I had. I really wanted something with a little bit stronger lens, zoom, and focus than my last camera. Granted, I knew I would have to give up the convenient size factor, but it was a worthy trade-off in my mind.

I settled on the Nikon Coolpix. It had some mixed reviews, some claiming it was the greatest camera for the $$ and others saying that it did not provide the features they had expected. I guess the jury will be out on that for awhile, until I really learn how to use all the features and whatnot.

I'm very excited to have a camera again, and have been taking tons of pictures in the past 24 hours. I'm sure you will also be excited about me getting a new camera, so you no longer have to come here to only read about my life...we all like pictures, right?

So, happy early birthday to me!