Reminder

Yet Another Jay and Deb Production.

I love the Willow Tree collectibles. I have several of them, all with a precious meaning to me. So, naturally seeing this tribute struck a cord.

The figurine shows a mom holding a baby, but it wouldn't have to be that relationship that we refer to. What about your spouse? Or a tired relative? Or a sick friend? Or just a friend's life in general?

This life is not all about us. As a matter of fact, its not about us at all.

Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. John 15:13

When I read this passage, it does not scream out that I must die for my friends, though I think that Jesus most definitely meant that we could be asked to make the ultimate sacrifice for our friends. Instead, in this day and busy age, I think it means to not choose yourself over others. To put aside your busy life and take time to love on your friends and family. "Lay down your life," and get it, and yourself, out of your own way!

Do you have those friends or family members who are always too busy? (All of you reading this should be nodding, because you know me.) It can be hard to cultivate those relationships and you often feel like they simply do not care. Our busy lives, that we think only effect us, can actually hurt other people.

Friends, join with me to help stop this crazy cycle. Let's all lay aside our lives for the people we love. Let's take the time to call a friend just to say hi. Let's stop what we are working on and jump on the chance to meet a relative for lunch. Let's worry less about the cleanliness of our house, and worry more about playing with our babies. Let's stop folding laundry and watching mindless tv shows at night and talk to our spouses. Let's get out of our own way, and let our love for others truly show them we care. Let's touch their lives.

Because you know what? This life is not all about me.

So far, so good

We had our 12-week appointment and ultrasound this week. My mom watched Ryleigh so that Jesse and I could both actually watch the ultrasound and pay attention. Haha, last time, Jesse was on Daddy-duty so much, he practically missed the whole thing. So this time, it was just us.

The ultrasound was first, and we were able to see the little one squirming around on the big screen. Seriously- it never stopped moving! The ultrasound technician had a hard time getting measurements and trying to snap a cute picture, because the baby just kept doing flips. We laughed because we have been begging God for a quiet, laid back baby this time...so far, it looks like this little one is going to be every bit as active as its big sister!

I met with the doctor afterwards and she assured me that all the measurements from the ultrasound were perfect and that my body was handling the pregnancy great so far. I had lost a few more pounds, so she immediately asked if I was sick again. I had about two or three weeks where I was sick, but NOTHING compared to my pregnancy with Ryleigh. My uterus was still growing, so she's not worried. The only thing that gave her cause for concern was the blood work I did last time I was there. Apparently, my thyroid levels were pretty low, so she had me go do more blood work, including a whole panel for the thyroid, just to make sure things are okay. I'm not terribly worried about it.

My belly feels like it is growing, but my pants are not fitting too snug yet, which is a good thing. Without going into too much detail, I will say that the biggest side effect I have noticed this go around is my breasts! INCREDIBLY SORE, all the time, and have probably doubled in size already. I truly think it is because they had so much extra to make up, after getting so small last time, but I digress.

So, that's that! I'm about 13-weeks now, and just chuckin' right along. We will not find out the sex until 20 weeks, which I think is later than we found out last time, but that's okay. It will be sometime near the end of May. It's still plenty early, but we are thankful for every good day and every good report. Thank you all for your excitement and support. =)

"Whose girl are you?"

I ask Ryleigh this question probably about 5 times a day. And every single time, her face lights up and she answers with a strong and resounding, "Gaga's gul!"

Honestly, I have even tried to change her answer to Mommy's girl or Daddy's girl, but no. Ryleigh says without a second thought or hesitation that she is most definitely Gaga's girl. And now, it is fine by me. :)

When I first found out I was going to be a mom, I was excited and nervous all at the same time. As my pregnancy crept along the nerves began to get stronger. I had no idea what the heck being a Mom really meant. Please do not misunderstand me: My own mom is amazing and was a heck of an example, but how does that happen? How do you become a mom?

If I'm being honest, I had some strange thoughts and emotions towards the end of my pregnancy and even in the first few months (possibly up to the first year!) of Ryleigh's life. Jealousy. Because everyone else seemed to know what to do and how I should do things. In fact, it was such a jealousy issue that I refused to do anything the way others did. I did not bring my daughter home from the hospital in the gown my mother and I both wore home. I did not let my mom give her the first bath. I did not let anyone pick out her special occasion outfits. I wrote out specific instructions for every minute that I was away from her, so that everyone followed MY way. Ryleigh was MY daughter and I was going to make sure everyone else knew that.

It makes me sad now. Because God placed people in my life and in hers to enrich both of our lives. To help us learn. To show me how to be a mother. Not to be her mother, but to help me be her mother. I was so afraid that if I shared one ounce of her care with anyone else, that they would shame me. They would be good at it and I would be bad. My own insecurities robbed us of a lot of precious things during her first year.

I do feel like I have gotten at least a little bit better in this regard. When any family wants to spend time with her, I jump at the chance. And I bite my tongue a lot to let them be with her however it works best for them. My sisters love to be silly and play with her, tease her, and love on her. Whatever they like is fine by me. Jesse's parents love to sit outside with her, playing with a ball or bubbles or in a sand box. Fine by me. My dad took Ryleigh to the park and they played on the swings. Fine by me. My sister-in-law treats her like one of her own; snuggles and kisses, but discipline and naptime too!

My mom is really super mom. I think that is how the term "Grand-mother" came about. Because Grandma's really are the BEST moms. My own grandmas were that way to me growing up. I LOVED to go see them and stay with them. There house was always a house of love, fun, and the most amazing memories. To this day, nothing warms may heart more than a great visit with my Grandma.

And Ryleigh already gets that. She LOVES her Gaga. She knows where she lives and talks excitedly in the car when we are headed there. She gives Gaga snuggles and laughter and yet knows when Gaga means business. When Gaga calls, Ryleigh practically takes the phone from my hand to talk to her Gaga. My mom is the ultimate mom. She entertains like no one else, and I have never seen her battery go low (like mine does daily). She will sit for hours, reading book after book, or watching silly shows, singing and dancing with Ryleigh, playing on the floor with toys, taking her to the park, feeding, cleaning, and caring for my daughter. It warms me to the core to see the love Ryleigh has for her Gaga.

So when Gaga tells Ryleigh, "you're my girl!" And Ryleigh gets it to the point that when asked, "Whose girl are you?" answers heartily, "Gaga's girl!!" She is right.

She is Gaga's girl.

Thanks Mom for loving my daughter like no one else. I appreciate all you do to help me out with her and I appreciate your patience waiting for me to "come around" and realize how important relationships are for Miss Ryleigh. She learns so much from you-- and so do I. We love you!

My girl

A Ryleigh update, complete with pictures, is probably long overdue.


My little girl is almost two, and wow, does this girl have a personality! She goes and goes and goes....ALL. DAY. LONG. She loves to be "a-side" (aka: outside), and if you want to be her best friend, all you need to do is take her to the park. She can swing and slide for hours!

Lately her vocabulary and overall understanding of the world has exploded. I know every parent probably thinks their kid is a genius, but seriously, she blows me away. Things she says and concepts she understands, things I have never consciously taught her, are beyond my wildest imagination. Kids really are more intelligent than we give them credit for.

Just a few examples of her extreme intelligence:

• So, earlier this week, the car was covered in pollen (yes, the yellow rain has come) so after I filled up with gas, I decided to go through the car wash. Very unlike me. I was curious how Ryleigh would react. At first, she was slightly nervous, but then started laughing and saying "silly bubbles!" It was a fun experience that she talked about for the rest of the night. Well, two days later, I had to go to the grocery store, and passed the car wash. She pointed out the window and said, "silly bubbles!!" as she knew the exact location! How does she know that??
  
• One of our neighbors always hangs outside in front of their house with their son (Jake). If we are running an errand, and drive by, Ryleigh always says, "bye bye, Jake," without prompting from me. And even if they are not outside, she will point to his house and ask about Jake.


• There is a common road between my parents house and Jesse's parents house. As long as we are on the common portion, she remains quiet in the background. But as soon as you either turn, or stay straight past the turn, she immediately begins saying either "Gaga's house?" or "RaRa's house?"


• She can count (on her own) to ten. No joke. And she counts along with me all the way to 20.


• She knows all her colors, most animals and animal noises.


• Ryleigh is the most polite little one ever (disclaimer: most of the time she is polite...)! She knows how to ask nicely "peeasse?" and if you get her what she wants, she will say, "tank you, Mommy!" Yesterday, while a nice older gentleman was bagging our groceries and loading them into the basket, Ryleigh leaned down to catch his eye and enthusiastically said, "tank you!" He said it made his day. :)
  

Now, all you moms out there know that this age is NOT all fun and games. Ryleigh is gaining independence and confidence...and her natural instinct is to deliberately disobey everything we say, and see just how far she can push before she gets in trouble. Jesse and I have had quite a difficult time learning how to discipline her. Half the time, one (or both) of us is laughing at what she just tried to do, though trying to keep a straight face to show it is not okay. And talk about having to learn to be consistent...toddlers do not learn the first time. Or the second. Or third...you get my point. Actually, at this point, I'm still wondering when they do learn. And how to help them learn. Originally, we said we would try the spanking thing, if the disobedience could result in physical harm to her or someone else, ie, running in the street, biting Daddy, etc. While our "spanks" were no more than a swat on the (diaper-padded) behind, we quickly learned that might not work for Ryleigh. When she started getting frustrated with us, she would swat our behinds!! No joke. Talk about trying not to laugh!! She got the concept from OUR side (when I'm not happy with what you have done, I spank), but not the fact that she was getting spanked as a result of what she had done--and thus changing her behavior! Sooooo, we moved on to Plan B. Time out. She has a small wooden chair in her room where she must sit for time out. She sits, and Mommy counts out loud (from the other room) for 30 seconds. If the temper-tantrum continues, we count again. After she is calm, normally after the first 30 seconds, I tell her she can get up, and I meet her at the doorway. She has to apologize for what she did, say "saw-wy" and give Mommy (or Daddy) a hug. So far, it seems to be working okay. The best thing for Ryleigh is to completely remove her from the situation all together and re-direct her attention to something more suitable for her. Doesn't always work, but hey, this is a learning process! For us as much as her! Some days, even more so for us than her...

Well, I'm sure you have read more than you cared to know, so I'll move onto a few pictures from last month.

While working one day, Ryleigh refused to nap. She laid down in her bed for all of 20 minutes. So after listening to her cry for another 30 minutes, I finally got her up. She played and played, insisting she was NOT "sweepy." I had to get some work done, so I stayed in my office while she played in the living room. A little while later, I noticed it had gotten really quiet...I went to check on her and she was not in the living room. She had gone into my room, climbed in our bed, and fallen asleep. I knew she was tired!

No matter what anyone else says, she is a Mommy's girl for sure. :) I love it!

Aunt Sarah came to town over Valentine's Day and Ryleigh wanted to help make dinner for the boys. Aunt Sarah let her help smash the crouton crumbles with the miniature rolling pin.

Ryleigh's Mother's Day Out teacher made them cupcakes for Valentine's Day, and of course, it was all I could do to make her wait until we got home before she devoured it. Couldn't help but snap a few pictures of her pink lips.

I cannot believe my baby is going to be 2 in a matter of months. Time has seriously flown by. She never ceases to amaze me, and I'm so blessed by her presence in my life. As difficult as this age can be, it is also an exciting time of learning and exploring, and her own excitement at life has rubbed off on Jesse and I. Never again will a "weaf" (aka:leaf) be just a leaf. Creation is even more beautiful when seen through the eyes of a child. Especially, my girl.

Great thought!

I just read this, and LOVED the analogy. Whether you have been married 2 weeks, 5 years, or 34 years....this is a great way to think of your marriage.

A friend at church once told me that we should always think of marriage as a room with the door closed and locked from the outside. If you think of the door as unlocked, then if a fire gets set inside, you'll be fixated on trying to get to the door and get out. But if you know the door is locked from the outside, all your energies will be focused on putting out the fire, rather than trying to escape.

The author then went on to explain that the fire IS going to come, and you want someone in that room with you who is just as determined to put out the fire. You fight together to stay together. "Co-fighters" she called it.

Love it.