"Whose girl are you?"

I ask Ryleigh this question probably about 5 times a day. And every single time, her face lights up and she answers with a strong and resounding, "Gaga's gul!"

Honestly, I have even tried to change her answer to Mommy's girl or Daddy's girl, but no. Ryleigh says without a second thought or hesitation that she is most definitely Gaga's girl. And now, it is fine by me. :)

When I first found out I was going to be a mom, I was excited and nervous all at the same time. As my pregnancy crept along the nerves began to get stronger. I had no idea what the heck being a Mom really meant. Please do not misunderstand me: My own mom is amazing and was a heck of an example, but how does that happen? How do you become a mom?

If I'm being honest, I had some strange thoughts and emotions towards the end of my pregnancy and even in the first few months (possibly up to the first year!) of Ryleigh's life. Jealousy. Because everyone else seemed to know what to do and how I should do things. In fact, it was such a jealousy issue that I refused to do anything the way others did. I did not bring my daughter home from the hospital in the gown my mother and I both wore home. I did not let my mom give her the first bath. I did not let anyone pick out her special occasion outfits. I wrote out specific instructions for every minute that I was away from her, so that everyone followed MY way. Ryleigh was MY daughter and I was going to make sure everyone else knew that.

It makes me sad now. Because God placed people in my life and in hers to enrich both of our lives. To help us learn. To show me how to be a mother. Not to be her mother, but to help me be her mother. I was so afraid that if I shared one ounce of her care with anyone else, that they would shame me. They would be good at it and I would be bad. My own insecurities robbed us of a lot of precious things during her first year.

I do feel like I have gotten at least a little bit better in this regard. When any family wants to spend time with her, I jump at the chance. And I bite my tongue a lot to let them be with her however it works best for them. My sisters love to be silly and play with her, tease her, and love on her. Whatever they like is fine by me. Jesse's parents love to sit outside with her, playing with a ball or bubbles or in a sand box. Fine by me. My dad took Ryleigh to the park and they played on the swings. Fine by me. My sister-in-law treats her like one of her own; snuggles and kisses, but discipline and naptime too!

My mom is really super mom. I think that is how the term "Grand-mother" came about. Because Grandma's really are the BEST moms. My own grandmas were that way to me growing up. I LOVED to go see them and stay with them. There house was always a house of love, fun, and the most amazing memories. To this day, nothing warms may heart more than a great visit with my Grandma.

And Ryleigh already gets that. She LOVES her Gaga. She knows where she lives and talks excitedly in the car when we are headed there. She gives Gaga snuggles and laughter and yet knows when Gaga means business. When Gaga calls, Ryleigh practically takes the phone from my hand to talk to her Gaga. My mom is the ultimate mom. She entertains like no one else, and I have never seen her battery go low (like mine does daily). She will sit for hours, reading book after book, or watching silly shows, singing and dancing with Ryleigh, playing on the floor with toys, taking her to the park, feeding, cleaning, and caring for my daughter. It warms me to the core to see the love Ryleigh has for her Gaga.

So when Gaga tells Ryleigh, "you're my girl!" And Ryleigh gets it to the point that when asked, "Whose girl are you?" answers heartily, "Gaga's girl!!" She is right.

She is Gaga's girl.

Thanks Mom for loving my daughter like no one else. I appreciate all you do to help me out with her and I appreciate your patience waiting for me to "come around" and realize how important relationships are for Miss Ryleigh. She learns so much from you-- and so do I. We love you!